Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Small Potatoes

Lately I've been taking big, bold steps into the person who I want to be. And to be honest, I've been taking those steps for more than a year now - moving to Colorado, buying a house with Benjamin, traveling, starting my own business, public speaking and living each day to the fullest. That when the small potatoes of working at the Market started to enter into my life, I am in awe and wonder why they are effecting me.

I walk around eggshells at work. I am not being my true self as a result and well, it's starting to take its toll.

Example: A gentleman walks into work saying he spoke with a coworker at the farmers market about labels. His timing is perfect - as our label maker was down for the count for over two weeks. It's back up and running but tends to break down easily. Unfortunately I don't have the authority to field such answers, so I ask someone who is if they have time to speak with him. The answer I received was one of frustration and angst - LOOK AT THIS PILE OF WORK! NO WAY! I deflect the response and tell the guy that if he could send me pricing in an email and how much it would break down to per label, I'll pass it on to the appropriate person.


Guess what I stop doing? I stop asking questions and avoid said person at all costs. Why would I want to subject myself to another frustrating situation if I can avoid it?


This has been going on for weeks. And I know I'm not the only one feeling the toll. So, in being true to myself and stepping into the person I want to be, I'm going to tell this person how I feel. And I'm going to do it from a place of love. If I get fired for doing so, then I'll know it's the right decision. But having to sacrifice who I am and not knowing if the eggshells will support my weight, is small potatoes compared to the things I've done.

It's funny how the little things can hold you back from the bigger things in life.

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