Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Drifting through

I've been waking up the past couple of weeks to dozens of thoughts drifting through my head. Unable to focus on one subject to make some sense of it, my mind bounces to the next. Little highlights of my life - current issues as well as past. Doing the dirty dishes, when I'm going to schedule in some stair running, paying this or that bill - the usual stuff that can bog down a day.

And often I wonder why I can't focus - why it's so hard to come to clarity when I have so much time to think. Reading certain books is a joke - I simply can't focus on them. My brain running a million miles a hour. I've reread the same paragraph probably 8 times.

Yet if I could focus, I wonder if I would just become a big puddle of tears. Maybe it's my brains way of coping - not allowing me to think too much on one subject but disperses its energy to avoid hurting my heart.

I am looking forward to having some fun. Getting out of the house - if only for a little while - to rejuvenate my spirit once again. I can't wait to howl down the slopes of Beaver Creek and eating shit in a big powder bowl. Good times, good times.

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