Well, yesterday was the day of lovers. And if you were lucky, your significant other took you out to dinner, wined and dined you and let you know that you are theirs and they are yours. It's not a huge holiday like Christmas or New Years by any means, but it is a day when you consciously tell those you love that you love them. Or you're painfully reminded that you are alone.
So rather then dwell on this "I'm all alone" blah, blah feeling, my old neighbor Jo and I headed to the Olympys spa to soak in some tubs and eat some Korean food. And I can honestly say it was one of the better Valentine day's that I've had. When you take the time for yourself and do something because you want to do it and it makes you feel good.
Funny though, the thought of missing Ryan didn't cross my mind until Jo brought it up that night. She had come across some old photos and there he was - bigger then life. It didn't sink in, the reminder of an empty place in my heart, until today. Thankfully it wasn't until after I had woken up, drank my morning coffee, and completed the morning rituals. No, it was much later. When I was listening to Pandora and then again in the gym - when a steady stream of old songs we used to listen to together came on. I was transported to Yosemite Valley - jamming to Weazer full blast on my Subaru speakers and feeling summer's warmth on our skin with the windows rolled down. It was one of those moments that you savor - knowing that the memory will be locked into the vault for years to come. And just by listening to that song, you're suddenly transported back to 2001, roaming a wide open space with huge monoliths of granite, the high sierras and feeling perfectly content.
As tough as they can be, the reminders are good. It is important to make sure you're not taking where you are in life for granted. That you're enjoying the moment, taking it all in; making the most of the little things, and locking those extra special moments of time in the memory banks for some other time when you might need them.