Battered and beaten down by the storm - my emotions have taken a heavy toll. Day to day I often forget the trauma I so recently experienced until it wells up inside of me and bubbles out. I fumble around during the day, unsure of what's wrong with me, why I lack the drive I used to have, why I can't find happiness in concentrating my efforts into training, why things are duller than they were before. And it isn't until I have a good cry, letting myself back into healing, that I realize this is grief.

Hurry up spring. I need your cleansing green colors, your blue skies and warm sun kisses. Now more than ever.