Friday, July 01, 2005

big fish in little pond?

Did I really hear you use that metaphor for me? Or did I just imagine that one? Thank you for the compliments - they were very kind of you.

I feel like that pinch me I'm dreaming again.

Lately I've been having a lot of philosophical thoughts - centered around the meaning of one's existance feeling. You know where you try to figure out where you fit into this spinning ball we call earth. When I was younger I tried to find that meaning through recklessness - drugs, alcohol, sex - and luckily I didn't fall flat on my face - not from a lack of trying I might add. Little did I know that at 18 when I came to the self-realization I did those things early in life so I wouldn't have to go through it when I was older and it mattered more - would be wise well beyond my years. I still thank my lucky stars I tried the self-destructive habits early and recovered completely from them. So you ask where's my wild side? Well I know it's there - it's just a little deeper than some and more self-destructive than others. You see my obsession and passion toward cycling? Well just think of how that could be turned toward vises. But why be another statistic?

I've always had a dream to become a motivational speaker. Travel the world and tell my story to hopefully inspire people to be the best that they can be - never settle for mediocracy. It's happening on a small scale - however I feel the people I surround myself with have a reciprocating inspiration. I'm babbling... but more to come when I formulate my thoughts more....

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