Thursday, June 09, 2005

back to normal

the meeting with joyce went really well. I am so happy that it did. We had our moments where we both put our baggage onto the table - and ultimately she apologized for her email and attacks. I told her that it is hard to approach her when she says one thing and then demonstrates another in person. I also mentioned Rachel about the "mediator" yet on Joyce's side thing. I told her that her upgrade question made me feel like I was set up and she admitted not meaning to do that. We basically had a meeting of the minds and are both willing to contribute to making this an amazing thing. I understand where she is coming from and she understands where I am coming from as well. Damn that woman has a lot of baggage. But she also has a vision and it should shine through in the end.

the bike is here. it is a machine. i would like to take some time and get together to ensure it is properly fitted. do you have any time this weekend?

And then I got home and started processing our conversation. I started to get angry - really angry. What she is pleading for me to do is to throw races to sacrafice my own performance for the team. Sure I understand this to an extent - but at the same time that's like asking an Olympian to step it down a notch and give it to another person. She had the audacity to say if you hadn't of won then Katy would have been third. Well then why the hell am I there? Why am I competing if it's not to go for the very best each and every time? This is all just crap.

No comments: